GQ's 'Tell'

To quote Candy Pratts-Price, "September is the January of fashion". Although fiscally, it's still August, all the September issues of Lust List's favorite magazines are hitting the newsstands with Fall Fashion Previews. I was flipping the pages of the newest GQ and came across something better than fashion.

Chris Heath, a contributor for GQ, was asked to interview dozens of gay servicemen from the past and present to find out what life has been like in their military career as the American government ends the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. The article is long and very touching. There are so many different stories, opinions, and survival tales. The issue has yet to hit GQ online, but I've shared a few of my favorite stories below.



"Many gay servicemen in the modern era - including Eric Alva [Marines, 1991-2004] - have completed long military careers without their sexuality ever being revealed. And therefore few people have realized that the first American seriously wounded in the invasion of Iraq during the second Gulf war was a gay man.

When Alva signed up, before 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell,' he had to lie on his paperwork. 'I knew I was lying,' he says. 'But I loved what I did, I loved my job, and I didn't want to tell anyone. I said, "It's going to be my secret." I knew I was not going to be happy in a way, but I knew this was what I wanted.' In 2003 he was deployed to the Middle East, and on March 21 he crossed the border from Kuwait. His unit was part of a huge convoy that stopped outside Basra. Alva got out of his Humvee and went to fetch something from the back of the vehicle. 'That's when I triggered the IED. I was awake, my hearing was sort of gone. The chaplain was holding my head and I was telling him I didn't want to die. I was taken off a helicopter in Kuwait - it was estimated that I was only in Iraq about three hours - and carried into surgery. I woke up later and when I looked down I saw that the right side of my sheet was flat. I cried myself asleep, only to wake up hour later and see that it's true: My leg is gone.'

As he recuperated, he learned about his inadvertent status. 'I don't know who designated me to be the first. I was never given a certificate or anything. One-millionth shopper. Now I have the dubious distinction of being the first American injured when the war started. It didn't make it better or worse. I mean, my life changed forever. I was angry that my leg was gone. Even when I was still in the hospital, hours would go by so slow, and I actually said to myself: "Who is going to love me now?" I'd never really experienced dating anyone. "Who is going to love me now? I'm missing a leg." '

Meanwhile, the media picked up on his story. He went on Oprah, People magazine gave him an award. But nobody thought to pry to deeply into his personal life. After the attention died down, his post-military world began to take shape. He went back to college; he did find a boyfriend. And when, in 2006, the battles over "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" in the military and gay marriage in the wider community were simmering, Alva's boyfriend at the time pointed out to him that he did have some notoriety that might be of use. 'I finally said, you know what, I'm going to tell my story. The first American injured in the Iraq war is a gay Marine. He wanted to give his life to this country.' "

"Since I'm a single officer in the Marine barracks and I've got the highest security clearance you can get, I also serve at the White House in close quarters with President Bush and President Obama at official events. Very seldom was the president ever alone, but one time the president had said, 'Go and get the vice president,' and the president went in the Blue Room and was just standing there waiting for Biden. And there was no Secret Service around or anything, and I went, 'Fuck it, I'm going to go and talk to the president about "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." ' He was looking out south - there's an incredible view down past the Washington Monument to the Jefferson. And I just stepped in and said, 'Sir?' and he turned around and walks to me and I just started: 'You know, sir. I want to let you know that there are a number of us that work very close to you who appreciate very much what you're doing on "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" - more than you probably realize.' And he was shaking my hand, he looks up and it's like...he got it. I said, 'I want to thank you for this.' And he goes, 'No, I want to thank you. Thank you for your service, and thank you for your courage.' "